Thursday, 11 September 2014

Should I Stay or Should I Go?


Will I stay or will I go? What if you are Scottish, in Scotland? What a dilemma! How would you vote? The No campaigners haven’t come across well, with their threatening and patronising points. And the Yes campaigners haven’t offered any concrete alternatives to the money, pensions, NHS and defence issues. But what little I know of the Scots, they have always wanted their own identity. We, the English just don’t get that, we don’t care so why should anyone else? We know we are a melting pot of raiders that didn’t go home. So where does that need for national identity end? Aren’t there a huge differences between the Highlanders and Lowlanders; Catholics and Protestants; Islanders or Mainlanders?

What else do I know about my Northern cousins? They tend to be thoughtful, reflective and compassionate. Probably more so than us Southerners would admit to anyway. But mainly, they are not stupid. Why bang on about them not knowing what is going to happen to them, as if they can’t possibly know? One of the traits that make us Islanders better at invention is our in-built belief that a problem can be solved, it’s only a question of thinking it through from different angles and the answer will come. And it usually does in Scottish, English, Welsh and Irish minds more than any other peoples on this planet.



Well imagine the Yes voters winning. Will the UK say they can’t use the pound? I don’t think so. Not until a debt repayment deal has been agreed.  Will the UK lend them money to get through this interim period? There will be Banks lining up to lend money at better rates than 0.5%. Will the EU welcome them straight in? It is possible Spain would block them as they don’t want to set a president with separatists getting special treatment by jumping the queue to get in. They don’t have to join the EU anyway, Norway isn’t doing to badly on their own.

And then there is Wales. I will move to Pembrokeshire and start an English freedom campaign to get Pembrokeshire annexed back to England, if those total tossers in the Senedd (Welsh version of Senate) get anymore powers to mess up. We now have the worst NHS in the UK and our education levels have gone from top equal with Northern Island to rock bottom (level with Clacton-on-Sea!). OK I did make that last bit up. No offence Clacton, you may well be better than those interviewed hoping to vote UKIP, last month.


As you can see, I have enjoyed venting my spleen, but once the adrenalin has stopped coursing through my Rioja hardened veins I really do believe we are better together.  Teams are always better than individuals at solving problems, there are enough of those on our near horizon. Good luck and may your God go with you.

Thursday, 4 September 2014

Good Day, Sunshine!


Good day, sunshine...what a great song, positive and happy and yet there is a little melancholy lurking about. My little world is a happy world; I have just reduced my working hours to 4 days a week and tomorrow promises to be sunny. This is good, as I plan to chase a small white ball aimlessly around a few (18) well kept meadows.

But, I feel like I am left with my 3rd form chums to play marbles in the corner of the playground while the thugs in the 6th Form are squaring up for a fight. This fight has been brewing for a month or so, but the biggest lump is reluctant to start it. He needs to clear the air, as the other thugs have been stealing sweats from the juniors.

How have we got to this? Surely it is a lack of clear leadership from the outset? We should have blasted Assad off the map last year, then the extremists would not have got the upper hand with the opposition to Assad. Now we will have to fight Isis for years to come. Obama could have turned around to all his Arab friends and told them to get involved or lose his protection. As to Putin, ask the Ukraine if they want to join NATO and the EU. If they say yes, then tell the Ukraine to hold a referendum across the whole of the Ukraine for a majority mandate. If the vote comes back in favour then NATO will have to accept, and then the Mad House Elf will either have to start a nuclear war or withdraw. Simples.

I am not finished yet. We in the UK, and I, are just as guilty as the rest, of opposing any more conferral with those spendthrift twats in Brussels and Strasbourg . But now we need to think again. Shouldn’t we have a combined force with our old “friends” with their genetic ability to march in time and drive Panzers? Those Ruskies won’t like it up ‘em. Don’t think the good people of Ohio will be in a hurry to join in any land fight in Europe until it’s nearly over. Now is the time to join forces, when we have a common enemy, we do have two fronts opening up...has this happened before?

Who will be our Churchill? Can’t imagine earnest Ed rallying the troops, shiny Dave has lost his credibility, nauseating Nick won’t come up to muster...but hey, who is this coming over the horizon with a big adam’s apple and smile like a crocodile...its Nige! Help!!!  Please come back, Boris!